Athena's new image
by captainspoon
Summary: Athena ditches her goody two shoes image, and turns evil!
1. Default Chapter

"Athena's new image." part 1.  
  
The Phsyco Soldiers training area, Japan. Sie Kensou, one of the team members comes in to find his teammate and girl of his dreams Athena Asamiya crying. The pop star goddess is weeping over a magazine article about her. Kensou goes to try and comfort her.  
  
Kensou- Athena, baby. What's the matter?  
  
Athena- It's this. My public have turned against me!  
  
Kensou- You know they'd never do that. You're their idol.  
  
Athena- Look for yourself. Waaahh!  
  
She hands him the magazine, a gossip mag about the fighters of KOF. Kensou sees a double page titled "Why we're sick of Athena."  
  
Athena- See?  
  
They read on. among the various anti Athena points are "Her 2001 outfit was awful, the short hair,while cute in 99 is just stupid now."  
  
Kensou- You change outfits every year. One or two are bound to flop.  
  
Athena- Boo hoo! Keep reading.  
  
He does. It goes on to a part reading, "And God, is her goody two shoes, I'm an innocent virgin image getting boring! We all know Kensou's giving it to her every night!"  
  
Kensou- God, I wish that were true.  
  
Athena- You're not taking this seriously!  
  
Kensou- Look, Athena. This is a gossip mag, bitching about people and revealing their secrets is what these people do.  
  
Athena- (starting to recover) You're right. Hey, I know what'll cheer me up. Let's read through the magazine and laugh about everyone else's dirty secrets. Cool, huh?  
  
Kensou- That's the spirit.  
  
They turn the page. Unfortunately, they hit a "wicked whispers" page. Kensou looks uncomfortable, guilty. Athena reads the first paragraph, which goes,  
  
"Which male Phsyco Soldier who isn't Chin or Bao was caught enjoying steamy three in a bed sex scenes with two KOF newcomers? Our perfectly placed source (Choi with a camcorder) caught him at it with a busty Mexican and a cute Korean. Our source describes the scenes as "Seriously Hot Stuff!" Apparently, a bottle of caramel sauce was also used.  
  
Kensou tries to look innocent. Athena is crying uncontrollably now.  
  
Athena- KENSOU YOU BASTARD! How could you!?  
  
Kensou- Uhhh..., they seduced me.  
  
Athena- I'm leaving! No one likes me! WAAAHHH!  
  
The goddess storms out, leaving Kensou feeling really bad.  
  
Kensou- Athena...come back. We'll let you join in next time?  
  
That night, Athena sits alone on a park bench still in tears.  
  
Athena- Nobody cares about me. Why would they turn on me? I'm a nice girl, I'm kind to dumb animals. Hang on, that's enough about Bao.  
  
Athena starts thinking about what to do next.  
  
Athena- Maybe I do need a new image. And not just a costume this time. If they don't like sweet, innocent Athena, let's see how they react to bad Athena.  
  
Using her Phsycic powers, Athena changes outfits. Unfortunately, due to stress, she fluffs it up. The pop star is standing there in a lime green chicken suit.  
  
Athena is embarrassed, hoping no one sees her.  
  
Athena- This isn't what I had in mind. A green chicken. OK, let's try again.  
  
Just before she can change again, she hears the sound of a camera. This is followed by Choi jumping out of a bush, and running away.  
  
Athena- Damn that little freak. OK, think bad, evil. Phsycotic.  
  
More focused this time, she succeeds.  
  
Athena is now wearing a red ripped boob tube with "Phsyco Bitch" written on, a red PVC miniskirt, big platform boots and ripped tights. Spiked jewellry, chains and a skull in place of the star in her hair complete the new image Athena.  
  
Athena- Now this is more like it. Look out world, evil Athena's here to cause havoc. First stop, the training centre. Make that little shit Kensou pay! God, this is gonna be fun.  
  
The Phsyco Soldier training camp. Kensou is over earlier grief and is bragging to Bao about his exploits with Angel and May Lee. The young boy is impressed, though doesn't understand some of the more graphic descriptions. Chin has not had a drink for an hour, and is in danger of sobering up. Athena strools in, smiling sweetly, holding a sake bottle.  
  
Athena- Hi guys. Miss me? Hey, like the new outfit? I'm going punk.  
  
Chin- Who cares. Did you get me any sake?  
  
Athena- Here we go. (hands him the bottle)  
  
Chin- About time. (starts gulping it down) Hey, this sake isn't right. Tastes like... really fake fruit juice! Aaahh!  
  
Athena actually gave her mentor a bottle of Sunny Delight. Chin starts going hyperactive, his body unused to fake orange juice. Kensou and Bao look on horrified as Chin starts running around leaping for no reason. Athena gives an evil giggle.  
  
Kensou- Athena! You could have poisoned him! Is this all because I cheated on you?  
  
Athena- No. THIS is!  
  
She gives her would be lover a vicious kick in the bollocks. The newly bad goddess then shoots a Phsyco Ball at him, flooring the boy.  
  
Bao- That's gotta hurt.  
  
Athena- Your turn.  
  
Bao- WHAT!  
  
She phscically lifts him up, before slamming him down right into Kensou's stomach. Athena then stamps on Kensou's balls with one of her platforms.  
  
Kensou- EEOWWW! WAAAHHH! Athena how could you! How am I supposed to visit Angel and May Lee with busted balls?!  
  
Athena- I'm a bad girl now. Hee hee. Now I see the fun the evil fighters have. Bye.  
  
She leaves to continue her mad quest to cause trouble and mayhem. As she goes, Athena is singing "Do you think I'm a whore?" by Kittie. Kensou and Bao are crying in pain. Chin, still affected by the Sunny Delight is now singing "Stayin' Alive" and doing the dance.  
  
  
  
End of part one. What will bad girl Athena do next? Will Kensou and co convince her to come back to them? What does this mean for her music career? Find out in part two, as soon as they let me out of the loony bin 


	2. chapter 2

"Athena's new image." part 2.  
  
After dealing with her now ex teammates, our newly evil heroine Athena decides that, if she's gonna last long as a bad girl, she'll need a bit of help. Rather conveniently, she passes a bar window, and spots criminal bodyguard Billy Kane, Orochi assasin Mature and ex army mobster John Crawley all sitting round a table. Athena goes in, and approaches the group as they exchange various hard luck stories.  
  
Billy- I tell you, things have really gone down the pan since Geese quit on the organisation.  
  
John- Quit, I thought he died? Again.  
  
Mature- John, you know it takes more than death to kill Geese.  
  
Billy- Well, I thought he'd died for good this time, but last week I get a postcard from him in the Bahamas. Look.  
  
Billy takes out the postcard, with a photo of Geese in a Hawaiian shirt and a nice tan. He has a cocktail, cigar, and two Carribean girls in bikinis surround him. The postcard reads,  
  
Dear Billy,  
  
Forgot to tell you before. After Real Bout, I escaped and retired to the Bahamas and taken all the organisation's money with me. Weather's lovely, and I've had a restraining order put on the Bogards. How's young Rock doing?  
  
Wish you were here, actually, that's a lie, Geese.  
  
Mature- The bastard. I've had a shit few weeks myself. Vice left me, she ran away with that little slut Whip. We were years together.  
  
John- I didn't know you and Vice were, you know, lesbians?  
  
Billy- You didn't? It was painfully obvious. Last year's anime convention, who did they cosplay as?  
  
As John struggles, Athena takes this opportunity to join in with the bad guys.  
  
Athena- Hi guys. I'm bad now too. Can I hang out with you?  
  
All three look at the new look Athena in a mix of amazement and lust.  
  
Billy- Now that's your best look so far. So why the change of heart?  
  
Athena- You guys finish your story, and I'll tell you mine.  
  
Athena sits with her new friends. John has still not worked out who Mature and Vice went cosplaying as, so Mature tells them.  
  
Mature- We went as Sailor Uranus and Neptune.  
  
John- The two rug munching sailor girls.  
  
Mature- YES! Dumbass, and Vice and I were into KD Lang too.  
  
After this, Athena tells them about her own situation. Before she finishes, Jhun Hoon, Tae Kwon Do master and hopeless Athena devotee comes up to her. He is horrified by the new image.  
  
Jhun- Athena! My goddess, what have you done?!  
  
Athena- New image, fanboy. Like it?  
  
Jhun- But... you, this isn't the cute, adorable Athena I love.  
  
Billy- Who's he?  
  
Athena- One of my stalkers.  
  
Jhun- That's not true! I'm no stalker. I'm a healthy, sane Athena obsessive. Just because I was seen lurking in her garden with a camera and own three pairs of her panties...  
  
Athena- WHAT! You pervert! Where did you get those?  
  
Jhun- I bought them from Kensou.  
  
Enraged at this, Athena gets up and nails Jhun with a "Phsyco Sword". Sending the man flying. The other villains cheer.  
  
Billy- YEAH! Go on Athena!  
  
Mature- That's telling the bastard!  
  
The group watch, excited as Athena beats the shit out of her number one fan. The recently converted bad girl then performs her "Shining Crystal Bit" DM, finishing Jhun off, and trashing some bar furniture in the way.  
  
Athena- Don't you come near me again, pervert!  
  
John- She's smashed a bit of furniture. Let's finish the job and trash the bar.  
  
Billy+Mature- COOL!  
  
Athena- Can I join in?  
  
Mature- Sure.  
  
They then proceed to completely wreck the place. As this is Athena's first act of vandalism, the others have to give her a few instructions as to what to do. Soon however, she's trashing the place like an expert, they throw furniture, booze bottles and customers dumb enough to still be there. Special moves from each of them also help to reduce the bar to a ruined building full of rubble.  
  
Proud of her achievement, Athena leaves with the others, and a few stolen boze bottles. The team make their way down the street, drunk, loudly and tunelessly singing a made up song concerning Mai Shiranui's active sex life. They continue, stopping only to set fire to one of Robert Garcia's sports cars, parked outside a lapdancing club.  
  
John- Ooh, what'll Yuri say?  
  
Athena- You guys are great. I never knew bad guys were this much fun. Let's all raise hell again tomorrow. Today, that bar and a few KOF losers, tomorrow, the WORLD!  
  
Billy- Alright. Sounds like fun.  
  
  
  
End of part two. What will Athena and her new friends get up to next? Is there any hope of her turning back to her old ways? Find out in part three, when I've actually worked out what will happen. 


	3. chapter 3

"Athena's new image." part 3.  
  
Next morning, the newly evil Athena and her new friends Mature, Billy Kane and John Crawley are in the front room of Mature's apartment. They are sitting discussing what they will do today, and recovering from their drink+drug fuelled four in a bed sex romp. Unknown to them, this was filmed by Choi, and will be appearing in tomorows papers.  
  
Mature- So what do you guys wanna do today?  
  
John- I dunno. Wanna go pick a fight with Athena's old team mates?  
  
Athena- OH fuck! I'm supposed to be giving a concert to a bunch of kids. Hey, now there's a chance to show the world my new image.  
  
Billy- Good idea. Let's see if you can influence them.  
  
Later on, at the venue where Athena's supposed to be, she is late. The promoter has just been trying to make excuses to the kids, and is stressed out.  
  
Promoter- Damn. That's the second act to screw up on me. I get a call yesterday telling me that CYS split up over creative differences. Chris wants to move towards rap metal, and Shermie's gotten into techno music. What am I gonna do!?  
  
Athena turns up, in her new punky bad girl outfit. Her friends are in the audience.  
  
Athena- Hi, sorry I'm late. Am I on?  
  
Promoter- Oh thank Christ. Now get out there and perform.  
  
Athena- OK.  
  
She gives an evil, knowing little laugh. As she goes on stage, she grins at the shock her new look is causing to all her fans, young kids and middle aged dads only there to lust over her.  
  
Athena- Hi everyone! Like the new image? I'll be trying out some new material. But first, as your goddess and role model, I'd like to give you kids some positive messages. Drugs are great! The harder the better. Set fire to your school! Eat your pets, and sell your best friends to NESTS for experiments! YAAAY! Steal your parent's savings and buy dangerous weaponary! Worship Orochi, no wait worship ME!  
  
The crowd are shocked. What the hell was Athena doing. This wasn't the sweet pop star they knew and loved.  
  
Fan- BOO! We want nice Athena!  
  
Athena- Right you little bastard! Guys, get him.  
  
Out of the audience, Billy, Mature and John jump out and rush the fan. While this goes on, Athena begins singing songs about ultra violence, sexual perversion, irresponsible drug use and door to door Jehovah's Witnesses. Generally unpleasant stuff.  
  
Another fan- I wanna go home! Jehovah's Witnesses are too scary!  
  
After the concert, which left most kids traumatised and in need of therapy, Athena and the group leave. As the others congratulate her, Shingo Yabuki watches them excited. With him is Kasumi Todo, looking bored.  
  
Shingo- So it's true. Athena's gone evil on us. This is my chance to show everyone what a great hero I am, and spread the word of Shingomania!  
  
Kasumi- Whatever. Just be careful this time. I'm not paying your hospital fees again. Remember what happened against Rugal?  
  
Shingo- I'm Shingo! The world's greatest. I don't need to be careful. OK, before I defeat them, have you got everything Kasumi?  
  
Kasumi- Sign, check. Stereo system, check. First aid kit, check.  
  
Shingo- Great! What are we waiting for? Is that the best you could do for a sign.  
  
Kasumi's sign of support for Shingo reads, "Shingo Yabuki: He's not that bad. Honest."  
  
Kasumi- I told you, you gotta pay me more the more moral support you want.  
  
Shingo- Leave it for now. Anyway, I'd better get them. You know what to do?  
  
Kasumi- "Sigh" yes.  
  
Shingo rushes heroically to our bad guys, ready to fight. Meanwhile his bored sidekick switches on the stereo to play his own KOF theme tune, and waves the sign about in a half arsed way.  
  
Shingo- Alright evil people! You've had your fun, now it's time for I, the great Shingo Yabuki to beat some goodness into you all!  
  
Billy- What'd you want then?  
  
Mature- Ignore him, maybe he'll go away.  
  
They try to ignore him. Shingo hasn't gone away. Now, he's trying harder.  
  
Shingo- Whatcha gonna do when the arms of Shingomania run wild on you, brother?!  
  
Athena- Excuse me. Are you feeling OK Shingo?  
  
Mature- Now he's stealing Hulk Hogan quotes.  
  
Shingo- Do you bleed blue and white?  
  
John- That's it. You're getting annoying now.  
  
Billy- Let's get the little turd.  
  
Athena- More mindless violence. Yeeaahh! Hooray!  
  
The foursome then proceed to totally kick seven shades of the proverbial out of the Kyo wannabe. After 10 minutes, all four baddies lauch their SDM's at the boy. Shingo is, as you might imagine, totally battered, several bones broken.  
  
Shingo- OWWWEEE! That's not fair! I shouldn't lose, I'm a hero! Kasumi, rescue me! AAAAHH the pain!  
  
Athena approaches kasumi threateningly. Kasumi shits a brick, and dumping the sign and stereo, runs for it.  
  
Athena- Cool, can I keep the stereo?  
  
  
  
End of part three? What will bad Athena do next? Who's gonna be the next victim? Where's this stupid story heading anyway? 


	4. chapter 4

"Athena's new image." part four. (finally!)  
  
The day after Athena's concert, which ended up leaving hundreds of kids needing phsyciatric help, and many middle aged dads looking for another young jailbait pop idol to leer at. Kensou has called a meeting at the Phsyco Soldiers training dojo to discuss what they will do about evil Athena. With him are Chin, Bao, Jhun and Karou.  
  
Chin- I say we follow the Kim Kap Hwan method and mercilessly beat the evil out of her, until she's good.  
  
Kensou- We can't do that! I still love her, even if I did have threesomes with Angel and May Lee.  
  
Chin- It's alright for you. You weren't poisoned by the fake fruit juice of Sunny Delight.  
  
Kensou- It was pretty funny watching you get hyperactive.  
  
Bao- I didn't know you knew the Stayin Alive dance?  
  
Chin- Shut up. So what do you suggest we do about her then?  
  
Karou- I'm not sure I can keep being her number one fan any more?  
  
Jhun- I'm the number one fan! Not you. And I'm still loyal.  
  
Meanwhile, at Mature's place, Athena and her new team of Mature, Billy Kane and John Crawley are recovering from a night of drink and drug crazed debauchery. John has a traffic cone on his head and Athena is mumbling the song "Birthday" by the Jesus and Mary Chain.  
  
Athena- Yeah, I'm a mean motherfucker now, but I once was cool. (pause) Yeah, I'm a bad motherfucker now, but I once was cool...  
  
Mature- Why is it, when we go out drinking, someone always ends up with a traffic cone or something, huh?  
  
John- You're never truly wasted unless you end up with one.  
  
Athena- Yeah, everyone knows that.  
  
While they discuss how out of it you have to be to bring a traffic cone home, the Orochi himself suddenly materializes in front of them.  
  
Billy- Bloody hell. Didn't think I was this mashed.  
  
Mature- What'd you want? We all quit your stupid boring cult in 1997.  
  
Orochi- I'm not here for you you daft cow. I'm here to see if Athena wants to join up? I'm really impressed with your new found badness.  
  
Athena- Don't you have to have Orochi blood or something to qualify?  
  
Orochi- That was before. Now that the ungrateful bastards all left me, I'm reduced to letting anyone in.  
  
Billy- So who's joined up so far?  
  
Orochi- Uhhh... no one.  
  
The group laugh at this. Orochi is now a god without any followers. Pretty irrelevant really. They all walked out on him after the Orochi cult Christmas party in 1997.  
  
Which we're now gonna flashback to. Goenitz's office, all the Orochis are there alive and well, trying to console themselves with their recent defeat. Shermie is performing a striptease on a desk, cheered on by Yashiro, who is covering Chris's eyes.  
  
Yashiro- Go Shermie go! Get 'em off! Yeah!  
  
Chris- I wanna see.  
  
Yashiro- You're too young.Plus, you're the gay appeal member.  
  
Chris- You never let me have any fun.  
  
As Shermie throws her bra at Yashiro, the other Orochis are just as crazy. Mature is photocopying her bare arse, Iori is unsuccessfully trying to seduce Leona, with mistletoe tied to his crotch. Yamazaki and Vice have a drinking contest (Vice is drinking him under the table) and Goenitz is puffing a joint.  
  
Goenitz(stoned)- Like, dig them crazy fucking aligators walking on the walls...  
  
Chris- I wanna see the aligators too.  
  
Yashiro- No. You're too young, we have to keep you cute and innocent, so's we look like a nice, friendly group.  
  
Chris- But I wanna be a bad arse macho man. Like Ralf, that guy's so cool.  
  
Iori- Come on Leona baby, just one kiss under the mistletoe? You know you want to...  
  
Leona just sits there. As suddenly as before, Orochi materialises before the party. He's pretty pissed off about how it's ended up.  
  
Orochi- Come on guys. We have to be serious! We're an evil cult intent on world domination. It's shit like this that caused us to lose KOF 97 so badly. So from now on, I'm banning members from drink, sex, drugs, videogames and anything else remotely fun! It's all work from now.  
  
Back to the present, Mature has just told the others about the Orochi Xmas party.  
  
Mature- And after that, we all told Orochi where to shove his cult, and got the hell out. The Orochi cult's gone down the toilet ever since.  
  
Athena- God, what a crappy cult.  
  
Here's something you never thought you'd see. Orochi is now begging to Athena to sign up with the cult.  
  
Orochi- Come on? Think of the power, all the things we could achieve? Please, I'm desperate here.  
  
Billy-You're less relevant than the Scientiologists, go on piss off.  
  
John- And you're fashion sense sucks too.  
  
Orochi- Says a man dressed like an extra from Top Gun. Avaitor shades went out in the 80s.  
  
Orochi,realising he has no credibility with Athena, leaves as magically as he came.  
  
Athena- He's inspired me you know.  
  
Mature- You're not joining him are you?  
  
Athena- Don't be stupid, he's a loser. But, I'm a goddess, now that I'm evil, I should be exploiting the fact. You know, making people do what I want, and doing really bad stuff to them if they don't. I could be onto something here.  
  
In preparation for such an event, Athena practises her best evil megalomaniac laughter. It takes a while,but she gets the hang of it eventually. End of part four.  
  
How will Athena exploit her goddess status? What will Kensou and co do to try and change her back? Find out in part five, when I've stopped seeing aligators what walk up walls. 


	5. chapter 5

"Athena's new image". part 5.  
  
After the Orochi's failed attempt to recruit Athena, her and the guys are trying to work out how to exploit her goddess status now that she's evil. Annoyingly, a knock on the door interrupts them.  
  
Athena- Damn it. Who's that? I'm trying to come up with plans here.  
  
Billy- If it's a carpet salesman, kill them.  
  
Reluctantly, she goes up to the door and opens it. Choi is there with his camcorder.  
  
Athena- What do you want? Shouldn't you be spying on other fighters having affairs or drugs?  
  
Choi- I'm here about the reality TV show you and the other Phsyco Soldiers agreed to do last month. Well, since you've dumped them, I figured I'd film the evil Athena. Viewers like watching bad behaviour.  
  
Athena- No... Uhh, hang on. This could be what I need to attract fans and followers to my cause. You'd better make me look good.  
  
Athena and Choi go to the others to explain the situation. We see them engaged in an argument about varoius fighters.  
  
John- That K9999 thing is the worst fighter ever. Crappy Tetsuo ripoff.  
  
Mature- Anime fans like K9999.  
  
Billy- Oh come on, there's been worse. Remember Cheng Sin Zan? Little fat businessman with a silly voice?  
  
Mature- I remember him. He was rubbish.  
  
John- Yeah, but K9999 makes Cheng look like, about as cool as Iori for fuck's sake.  
  
This angers both Mature and Billy, who've both had bad experiences involving Iori. They get up and attack John. Billy nails him with a Tri Kane Smash, after which Mature finishes him using her Metal Massacre, knocking the ex soldier down. Choi is filming the whole thing.  
  
Mature- You don't mention Iori in this house. Not ever.  
  
Choi- Great way to start the TV series  
  
Athena(to the camera)- This is my life. I'm Athena Asamiya, your goddess and star of this show. I used to be a goody two shoes but saw the light, and found that being bad is much cooler. And that's why all you viewers at home should worship me. I'm far cuter than Rugal or Geese.  
  
She finishes off introducing herself. Athena then directs Choi to the beaten John, who is barely concious.  
  
Athena- That guy's John Crawley. He turned to crime after being kicked out of the army. Billy told me that he once got drunk, and tried to invade Disneyland with a stolen bumper car and pink Virtua Cop gun.  
  
She then goes to look for Billy. They find him sitting there watching TV.  
  
Athena- And here we have Billy Kane. He used to have a well paying job with Geese Howard, but after the organisation fell apart, he's become angry and bitter at the world, particularly at anyone called Bogard.  
  
Billy- Yeah, it's all gone crap. My sister dates Joe Higashi, and Geese ran away to the Bahamas. I got this from Geese yesterday. Big pile of shit. Geese has many talents, but reggae ain't one of 'em.  
  
Billy takes out a home made tape. The tape has "Bred'ren Geese's Ruff Reggae Mix" written on it and a photo of Geese in a Rasta hat, string vest and the normal huge trousers.  
  
Athena- I think Geese has spent too much time in retirement. Anyway, let's go find Mature.  
  
On their way to find the Orochi assasin, Athena stops Choi when they get to a traffic cone.  
  
Athena- And this is a traffic cone. We seem to end up adopting quite a few stray cones after nights out.  
  
Choi- Oh Kay then.  
  
They find Mature in the kitchen, with a bottle of scotch.  
  
Athena- This here's Mature. Secretary, assasin and former lesbian lover to Vice. The break up was kinda hard on her, hence, the booze.  
  
Mature- Athena. I am SO over Vice. She can do what she likes with that slutty jailbait Whip. A little kid barely out of her training bra.  
  
Ahtena- Whatever. (whispers to the camera) She's not really. Look.  
  
On the kitchen wall, is a large photograph of the two Orochi killers in a loving embrace, grinning like retards. Vice has been scribbled on in red pen, details including devil horns and a Hitler moustache. The words "DIE VICE, DIE!" have been scrawled underneath, and a few kitchen knives stick out of the photo.  
  
Athena- We'll leave you to cry into your booze then Mature.  
  
Mature- I told you! I'm over Vice! Who cares!?  
  
As they leave, Mature starts crying heavily over the broken relationship, throwing things around and cursing Whip's name.  
  
Athena- Poor woman. She actually wants Vice back.  
  
Mature- I heard that you little bitch!  
  
Billy- Denial won't make it any better.  
  
Mature- Aw, go shove that cane up your arse!  
  
Billy and Athena laugh as Mature continues sobbing. John has finally got up from his earlier beating.  
  
John- Why'd you have to tell them about Disneyland?  
  
Billy- It's one of those funny stories that makes good reality TV. Did Athena mention the part about John being finally apprehended by sercurity in Mickey and Donald outfits and baseball bats?  
  
Athena- Cool. Now everyone in the world knows.  
  
John is hiding his face in shame, as the others laugh. Even Mature comes in, cheered up to point and laugh at him.  
  
John- Wasn't funny. Spent six months in a Disney themed prison afterwards.  
  
Mature- So what do you guys wanna do now?  
  
Athena- Hey I know? Let's go and hijack the NESTS main base. It'll be fun, please? We could take over NESTS, just to destroy it or something.  
  
Billy- Sounds good to me. You gonna film this Choi?  
  
Choi- Wish I could. But I've gotta go. I've had a tipoff about Andy Bogard having an affair with pirate girl Jenet. Bye. Thanks for the footage.  
  
Mature- So that's why Andy never shows Mai any interest. Because he secretly has a girl with bigger tits.  
  
Athena- That explains it. Now, plans to invade NESTS. Preferably not involving bumper cars and pink arcade guns.  
  
We leave our group of anti heroes planning their attack on NESTS main base. Will they succeed? What are Kensou and that lot doing? Does anyone want Athena to turn back into a nice girl? Find out in part six!  
  
(walks off, badly singing Talkingheads "Road to Nowhere", an accurate description as to where this story's headed. 


	6. chapter 6

Athena's new image. Part 6.  
  
Our anti heroine Athena and her group are on their way to invade the NESTS main base. Using one of John Crawley's old heilcopters and the well thought out plan based on "Fly over to them and do whatever we need to to make them give up". It took the gang five hours to come up with that masterpiece.  
  
Mature- So what exactly are we going to do to make NESTS surrender? I didn't quite catch that part.  
  
Billy- Does it really matter? If it works, great. If not, try something else.  
  
John- So we don't actually have a plan?  
  
Mature- What else is new.  
  
Athena is looking at the stickers John has on the chopper window. They include "Don't follow me, I'm lost too.", and "My other chopper's the one off Airwolf."  
  
Athena- We better not get lost this time. Got stuff to do, not sure what yet, but...  
  
While they fly over to NESTS, at the base unknown to them, a situation has broken out. K9999 has gone mental and taken Krizalid and Angel hostage. These three are all that's left of NESTS after the last KOF tournament. The Tetsuo ripoff is angry about that very reason. He has them tied to chairs, and has his shotgun arm out.  
  
K9999- I can't take it any more! Why was I created as a Tetsuo clone?! I'm the laughing stock of KOF!  
  
Krizalid- I'm in charge here. You've murdered your creator our anime obsessive scientist Aidrian. Now stop this, and...  
  
K9999- You know what the real tragedy here is? I HATE ANIME! It's stupid. All giant robots and jailbait schoolgirls. Can't stand the stuff. Give me the Hollywood classics any day.  
  
Angel- I don't know what anime is, but aren't I sexy?  
  
Krizalid- Yes, very interesting. Now shut up, bimbo.  
  
Angel's unintelligent contribution leaves K9999 lost for a second.  
  
K9999- Why do we employ her?  
  
Krizalid- It was Zero. He said after Whip and Vanessa left, we needed a bit of sex appeal in NESTS. Plus, she's too stupid to argue with us when we tell her to wear those skimpy outfits. I like the French maid one myself.  
  
Angel- I like sex appeal. It's great.  
  
Krizalid- Angel, be quiet. No one's interested. We hired you for your tits, and arse, not your thoughts.  
  
K9999- Anyway, as I was saying. Anime fucking sucks. I don't wanna be Tetsuo. Why couldn't I be Darth Vader?  
  
Krizalid- Count yourself lucky. Aidrian's original idea was to have you as a Dragonball ripoff.  
  
K9999- Urgh, Dragonball. Shit. Or I could be Colonel Kilgore. I do a great Kilgore impression. Excuse me a minute.  
  
Angel- Who's Darth Vader?  
  
As K9999 goes off for a few minutes, the two hostages hear the sound of a helicopter approach.  
  
Angel- Hey, it's a, a... (thinking VERY hard) inflatable banana.  
  
Krizalid- Aw Christ! HOW did you come to that conclusion!? Just shut up from now on. Why didn't sercurity pick this up?  
  
Unfortunately for NESTS, due to cutbacks following their defeat, sercurity consists of one slightly pissed off poodle at the door, and a red alert light with a green bulb. K9999 comes back, dressed as Colonel Kilgore from Apocolypse Now.  
  
K9999- I love the smell of HSDM's in the morning! Smells like, victory. Whadda ya think guys?  
  
Krizalid- Yeah, very nice. We've got bigger problems now. That helicopter sounds dangerous.  
  
Angel- Maybe it's Father Christmas, come to give us presents.  
  
Outside, John keeps the chopper hovering outside. Athena takes a megaphone and makes her announcement to NESTS. Down below, the poodle is barking at them a bit.  
  
Athena- This is your goddess, bad Athena shouting at you. You have five minutes to surrender your base to us, or, we'll... we'll do something anyway.  
  
Billy- Love the guard poodle by the way.  
  
Krizalid- What are we gonna do? K9999, you have got to untie me. We're in deep shit now!  
  
K9999- Bad Athena's don't surf! (he then morphs his mutant arm into a megaphone) Alright then Athena have the base.  
  
Krizalid- What!  
  
Angel- Can you let me free? The Sunset Beach marathon starts soon.  
  
K9999- That's tomorrow you retard! Anyway guys, I'm going. Have fun, I'm gonna be Kilgore from now on. Bye.  
  
As K9999 dressed as Kilgore leaves, Athena and her friends enter, claiming the base as their own. They are now quite disapointed with their new conquest.  
  
Mature- Is this it? What a shithole.  
  
Billy- Where's all them hi tec gizmo's you NESTS types are famous for. All I see is a PC and a green "red alert" signal.  
  
Angel- I've got a tamagotchi. It's called Fluffy and...  
  
Krizalid- For the love of God! Could you guys shut her up or something? Do what you want with the base, but no more inane comments from her.  
  
Mature- Do you guys have any money at all? Anything worth taking. Come on, we're desperate here.  
  
John- I found thirty six dollars in this Tellytubbies moneybox.  
  
Billy- I found these dirty photos of Angel in a nurse's uniform. Hey Athena, isn't that Kensou with his hand between her tits?  
  
Athena sees this photo and is enraged. She is reminded about Kensou's cheating on her, and turns her anger to Angel, one of the girls responsible.  
  
Athena- Right you dumb bitch. You're gonna suffer now!  
  
Angel- What does suffer mean?  
  
Before she can say anything else retarded, Athena covers Angel's mouth with tape. She is holding a large plank of wood, ready to do Angel some serious damage.  
  
Mature- Thank God. That girl sure does talk shit.  
  
Krizalid- Don't get me started. You never had to hear her story about a pair of trousers called Dave.  
  
Billy- Oh Kay, right. Dave the trousers.  
  
As the rest of the group help themselves to NESTS meagre possessions, Athena drags Angel to the far corner to dish out a bit of punishment.  
  
Athena- You're dogmeat now, bimbo. Though you hardly have any brain to suffer brain damage.  
  
She smacks Angel round the head with the plank of wood over and over whilst repeating "I'm the daddy now!" loudly.  
  
Due to this, she fails to notice Kensou, Chin, Bao, Jhun Karou and for some reason Vice.  
  
Kensou- Athena. NO!  
  
Athena- What the fuck! Aw it's you. What do you want?  
  
Jhun- Well, for a start, you shouldn't say "I'm the daddy now!" since your female.  
  
Athena- Oh yeah, thanks. (She hits Angel again) "I'm the mummy now!"  
  
Kensou- No! STOP! We want the old Athena back. The lovely, pleasant cute good one who was the only reason we lasted so long in KOF.  
  
Athena pauses from giving Angel her beating. She notices Vice is in the group.  
  
Athena- What's she? An honourary Phsyco Soldier.  
  
Vice- I'm here 'cause I want Mature back.  
  
Athena- Aww how romantic.  
  
Kensou- Come on Athena. This whole bad girl thing isn't you. All that new music of yours about evil stuff. Murder, devil worship, obscene sex, drug abuse and those fuzzy dice you get in cars. It isn't right, and most of your fans are in therapy.  
  
Athena- It'll take far more than that to convince me to go back to being sickening little miss goody two shoes.  
  
End of part 6. Will Kensou and the group convince Athena to go back to her old ways? Will Vice and Mature get back together? Will Angel talk any more crap? Find out next chapter. Same KOF time (possibly), same KOF channel. 


	7. chapter 7

"Athena's new image". part 7.  
  
Hey everybody! It's a big, senseless fight scene. The most ridiculous KOF battle since Orochi Iori took on Yamazaki in an argument over which washing powder produces the whitest whites.  
  
As Athena was smashing Angel's head with a plank of wood, Kensou and her other old friends have arrived. They are here in order to convince her to rejoin their side for goodness. So far, they aren't making a very good job of it.  
  
Kensou- Athena please? We need you, and so do your fans. We can't get into KOF without you, and Jhun and Karou have cried themselves to sleep every night.  
  
Athena- Really? Ha ha ha. That's so lame.  
  
Jhun- Remember how much the fans loved the cute, sweet Athena? This bad girl thing isn't you.  
  
Athena- It's too much fun being evil. You do what you want, no one fucks with you. Pretty soon, I might be ready to take over the world. It'll be SO cool.  
  
Chin- Told you she wasn't coming back, let's go home. Hey Vice, wanna replace her? You've not nicer breasts and...  
  
The drunk old fart is cut off when Vice hurls him across the room. Vice then goes off to find Mature, with the intention of winning back her girlfriend. She's holding roses and chocolates.  
  
Mature, along with Billy and John are looting NESTS meagre possesions. Among the rubbish they've taken are Foxy's old haircare products and Lucky Glauber's mostly false autobiography "Oh No! Not another shameless cash in! The Lucky Glauber Legend." Krizalid and Angel are still tied up.  
  
Billy- They'll release any old KOF related crap these days.  
  
Krizalid- You can't take that. It's signed.  
  
Vice- Mature honey. I want you back, I love you. Remember the good times when we were KOF's premier lesbian couple?  
  
Mature- Should have thought of that before running off with Whip, shouldn't you? Bitch!  
  
Vice- That didn't work out. The little whore ran away with all my money. And my Sailor Moon stuff.  
  
Billy- Piss off. Mature has no interest in a woman with an Adolf Hitler hairdo.  
  
Suddenly, Mature grabs Billy by the neck, choking him.  
  
Mature- Don't you insult my baby's hairstyle! Vice has lovely hair, not at all Hitler like!  
  
John- Uh, Vice DID cheat on you, Mature.  
  
Mature- Oh yeah... that's true that is. Now I'm lost.  
  
After two minutes of being confused, Mature reaches out to strangle Vice as well as Billy. Athena sees this.  
  
Athena- Ooh, a fight scene. Come on you wussies. Join in, here, I'll start.  
  
To start things her end, Athena boots Kensou in the bollocks, who charges her in response. Bao punches Jhun in the stomach.  
  
Jhun- What'd you do that for?  
  
Bao- Big fight scene. We've all got to join in.  
  
In response, Jhun sends the annoying kid flying with a "Full Moon Slash". Now most people in the room are taking part in a massive "all vs all" brawl.Karou, not being a fighter is hiding under a table with a colinder on her head.  
  
Karou- Don't hurt me. I'm innocent. (seeing Billy nail Chin with a "Tri Kane Smash") Ow that's gotta hurt.  
  
Krizalid has been released so that he can take part. No one cared enough about Angel to let her join. Unfortunately, the tape has come off her mouth, leaving her free to talk crap.  
  
Angel- This game looks fun. Can I play? where's the ball?  
  
Even Shingo and Kasumi from part 3 turn up, having heard there's a big silly fight.  
  
Shingo- As the future hero of KOF, I demand you let me take part in this brawl!  
  
Angel- Hey, you're Iori's son aren't you.  
  
Shingo and Kasumi look blankly at one another. They both then pick up the NESTS bimbo, still tied to her chair and throw her into the crowd. John, Vice and Bao are knocked over, and the newcomers then rush to get stuck in.  
  
Kasumi- Yeah, fight scene! (attacking Krizalid) Kill! Maim! etc.  
  
This big brawl rages on, with everyone fighting everyone else. Bao taunts Vice, getting her mad.  
  
Bao- Vice has Hitler hair, Vice has Hitler hair...  
  
The Orochi babe slams the stupid hat boy into the floor with her "Black End". Elsewhere, Kensou and Shingo hit each other, with no clear winner.  
  
Kensou- You'll never be the KOF hero. I've got the Dragon Spirit. As soon as I learn what to do with it...  
  
Shingo- Face it. Without Athena on your team no one gives a rat's arse about you...  
  
Their stalemate brawl is interrupted when Athena dives into them with a "Phoenix Arrow", flooring them both.  
  
Athena- DIE! You irrelevant little shits.  
  
Krizalid is fighting back against Kasumi, who attacked him.  
  
Krizalid- Try to jump me will you? You little cow!  
  
Kasumi- At least I don't dress like Prince, or whatever you call him these days.  
  
This is all Krizalid needs to catch her out using his "Air Whirl Uppercuts".  
  
Meanwhile, the fighting continues with Jhun versus Mature and Chin against John. Anybody knocked down before has gotten back up, to face a new opponent. Everyone is fighting except Bao, who's simply being battered about by everyone else. Shingo throws his body at John's head.  
  
Shingo- HA! Who needs fire when you can throw irritating kids in dumb hats at people.  
  
Angel- I know. Let's all have a singalong. I'll start and everyone else join in. It'll be fun...  
  
Everyone else- SHUT UP MORON!  
  
Thankfully, Billy smacks her across the head with his staff. While this happens, Mature catches Athena off guard using an "Ebony Tears".  
  
Athena- What was that for?  
  
Mature- This is a senseless fight scene. There's no sides right now. You won't make a good villian by being so gullible...OWW!  
  
She falls over, having been hit in the back by Kensou's "Dragon Claws".  
  
Athena- Thanks Kensou.  
  
Kensou- Does this mean you'll come back to us?  
  
Athena- No. I'm bad now. Let's carry on fighting.  
  
After an hour of mindless but fun violence, everyone launces their DMs at everybody else. First, Kasumi defeats Bao with her "Ultimate Ecstacy Crunch" before she is nailed by Chin's "Flame Blast" who in turn falls to Billy's "Flaming Stick Spin". Billy's then beaten by Krizalid's "Desperate Oppression Rage" who is taken out by John's "Super Mega Smash". Vice catches John in her "Negative Gain" shortly before Mature beats her using a "Heaven's Gate". Jhun is next, defeating Mature using his "Phoenix Nail Kick" before being overcome by Shingo' "Burning Shingo".  
  
Being the loveable idiot he is, Shingo trips over Bao's beaten body, knocking himself unconcious. This leaves only Athena and Kensou who collide with their respective DMs. Athena using her "Shining Crystal Bit", Kensou with his "Dragon Raiser" The result is that both of them KO each other, leaving only Karou and Angel still concious. Karou removes her colinder and cautiously peeks from under the table.  
  
Karou- What do we do now? Everyone who matters, and a few who don't are knocked out cold.  
  
Angel- You know, I still have no idea what's going on.  
  
Karou- You never do. You're just NESTS pet bimbo.  
  
Whew, that's the end of the helluva big, helluva ridiculous fight scene. How will it all end? Will Athena turn back to justice, good and unbearable sweetness? Or is the new evil, punky, hate fuelled Athena here to stay? Your guess is as good as mine for the moment.  
  
PS. I took some move names from various FAQs, so please excuse any wrongly named attacks. 


	8. chapter 8

"Athena's new image". part 8.  
  
After the big, stupid fight, everybody ended up having been knocked unconcious by each other's DMs. After a while, they all begin to wake up, battered, bruised and dazed.  
  
Shingo- Oww, my head hurts. So who actually won?  
  
Vice- God knows. Let's call it a draw. We all beat each other.  
  
Kensou- Except for Bao. He's crap.  
  
Angel- Oh hey. Your'e all awake from sleepy time. Time to start a new day...  
  
Athena- We've been KOed about twenty minutes, bimbo.  
  
On seeing Athena, Kensou remembers why he's there in the first place.  
  
Kensou- Athena, my love. Come back to us. All your fans miss you and want the old Athena back.  
  
John- I don't.  
  
Chin- Who asked you, Top Gun reject?  
  
While Kensou and co attempt to convince Athena to rejoin the goodies, Vice continues her quest to get back with ex lover Mature. Billy, John and Krizalid watch in the hopes of a catfight.  
  
Vice- Mature honey. I love you, I need you back. Remember how good the sex was? Whip was crap in bed. Please?  
  
Mature- I don't know...  
  
Vice- And who else are you gonna go to anime conventions in cosplay with. We're perfect for each other.  
  
Mature is seriously thinking about going back to Vice. Annoyingly, someone starts singing the T.A.T.U song "All the things she said". It's Bao.  
  
Mature- What the fuck do you want?  
  
Bao- I figured it could be your new theme song. It suits you, being lezzies and all. Now, if you both get into little school uniforms...  
  
Vice- That's it! I'm gonna kill that kid!  
  
Mature- Vice, wait.  
  
Vice- Why?  
  
Mature- Let's both kill him. It'll be romantic, and we haven't done anything together in a while.  
  
As the newly back together Orochi killers beat the crap out of Bao, Kensou continues to try and make the case for Athena to come back with them.  
  
Kensou- Come on Athena. You were the KOF fans little darling. We need you, they need you. This bad girl thing isn't you.  
  
Athena- I don't know. The fans turned against me, you cheated on me, plus it's fun being evil. Besides, out of the regular KOF teams, us and the Koreans were always seen as jobbers. Plus bringing in Bao really hurt our credibility. Now, I don't have to care whether fans like me or not.  
  
Kensou- I'll admit Bao was a mistake. Chin bought him from Ralf in a bar.  
  
Chin- I was drunk, he was cheap, and we needed a crap sidekick. In fact, he came free when I bought Baitang.  
  
Athena is having a crisis, trying to decide whether to turn back into a good girl, or stay evil. In the tired old cliche, her good and bad conciences appear to convince her either way.  
  
Angelic Athena- Come back to the good guys. Everyone loves the old sweet innocent Athena. You'll easily be back in fashion. Besides, that punk look really isn't you, girlfriend.  
  
Satanic Athena- Fuck all that shit. Evil's great, carry on like this, and you'll conquer the universe in no time. The fans are just dumb ten year olds, and middle aged pervs.  
  
Jhun- Before this, I'd never have guessed that Athena had a satanic side.  
  
Kasumi- Next, we'll see Rugal's nice, generous persona.  
  
Real Athena- This is my concience crisis. You two piss off.  
  
Angelic Athena- Remember all the happy little fans paying good money for any old merchandise bearing your image? Then paying for the same old shite next year when you changed costumes.  
  
Jhun- I resent that! No Athena merchandise is shite!  
  
Karou- You obvously missed the Athena musical toilet seat.  
  
Jhun- YOU'VE GOT THAT! I MUST HAVE IT! I WILL PAY $500 FOR IT!  
  
Karou- Done.  
  
Billy- Sad bastard. Won't catch me doing any of that. (he then realises he is holding a copy of Lucky Glaubers lying memoirs).  
  
This talk of merchandise hits the right spot in Athena. People must love her, if their even willing to pay a lot for a musical toilet seat with her on it. And all this merchandise is based on the Athena of old. Cute, polite, innocent, fan friendly.  
  
Athena- They really love me. It feels great to be everyones idol. I'd better turn back to my old self again.  
  
She magically morphs into her KOF 2002 outfit. Kensou and her other old friends are very happy.  
  
Kensou- Does this mean you're coming back to us?  
  
Athena- Oh yeah. Everyone loves the nice me. Kensou, get on the phone to my agent. We're gonna assault the market with even more crappy merchandise and make us richer.  
  
Chin- That's the spirit girl.  
  
Billy- What about us? Mature, tell her.  
  
Mature however is busy hugging and exchanging sweet nothings with her lover Vice. John keeps watching in the hopes they'll start shagging.  
  
John- So Athena's back to normal. Damn. I was hoping to fuck her.  
  
Billy- I was gonna sleep with her you turd.  
  
And so, the Phsyco Soldiers were reunited for truth, justice, overly cuteness and useless overpriced merchandise. Athena, Kensou, Chin, Jhun, Karou and a savagely beaten Bao head for home.  
  
Kensou- Come on Athena, let's go home. We took Lin in as a lodger in your old room, but you can have Bao's room.  
  
Bao- HEY!  
  
Chin- You can sleep in the airing cupboard or something.  
  
Athena- I'm still pissed off at you Kensou for cheating on me.  
  
Kensou- So, are you and me a couple now?  
  
Athena- Kensou, I like you. But we can't be a couple. It would break all my fans little hearts.  
  
Kensou- God damn the fans.  
  
Jhun and Karou look at him threateningly.  
  
They leave to plan the next step in Athena's career. Shingo and Kasumi also leave, having had nothing to do with this whole scene anyway.  
  
Shingo- Let's go find something better to do.  
  
Kasumi- OK, where'd you wanna go?  
  
Shingo- Let's go attack Goenitz. That guy's evil, and I'm a hero.  
  
Kasumi groans and follows him in the hopes of talking Shingo out of this madness. She is sick of paying his hospital fees.  
  
Krizalid- Well, looks like NESTS is truly over. I'm leaving to look for a proper job. D'ya think Kim still takes in reforming ex criminals?  
  
Angel- I want to be an Orochi when I grow up.  
  
Vice- You already are grown up. In body at least.  
  
John- Ignore her. She's thick as shit that girl.  
  
Angel- I am not thick! I've got a nice slim figure with huge tits.  
  
Anyone else still there- SHUT UP BIMBO!  
  
Mature- Vice. Come back to my apartment. It'll be like the good old days again.  
  
Billy- What about me and John?  
  
Mature- I want you two freeloaders out by tonight.  
  
Billy+John- Aww! fuck!  
  
  
  
Whew! That's the end of this crazy story. A big thank you to everyone who posted positive comments, they were much appreciated. Kept me going in my long winded lunacy. There'll be more fanfiction from me in the future, as soon as I work out what it'll be. 


End file.
